Things to learn:

I need to stop comparing myself to other people.

I need to stop being jealous of other people.

I need to stop looking for attention.

I need to stop complaining and just do shit.



And I need to not be so hard on other people because they're more accomplished than I am.

Dream

I had a dream last night that I was going with a test class of students to live on the space station.
I remember being in a space suit, taking my seat and getting strapped in. I was surrounded by other strangers in suits, everyone waiting to go (which took forever). I remember calling my mum and crying, knowing I'd probably never see her again.

Sometimes I'm afraid that everyone's too far away. Everyone's leaving. Everyone's going off to explore the rest of the world, and I might be the last one left, here. Lindsay's going to CA, Alex wants to go to CA, Kate McElroy will probably end up in Toronto, Andy Fish is moving to Oregon, and Jared's in Maine.

I'm afraid of leaving my family, I guess, and I'm afraid of being alone and confused.

But there are so many adventures I may be missing out on, but I'm too afraid to take any leaps.


Gotta go, my ship's leaving.

I don't know if I can stop crying long enough to go outside today.

But I have to.